Kids and chores. The age-old problem. We know kids need to do chores. We want kids to do chores. And we even have our own laundry list (see what I did there?) of chores and tasks that we have to do. How can we get all of our work done and encourage our kids to take responsibility for their own?
Thanks for checking into our series Creating Meaningful Moments. We have already discussed how to stay present with our kids and how to make use of downtime. If you missed the first three posts, please click on any of the links above to catch up. Today, we are talking about how to incorporate age appropriate chores for kids into our daily tasks.
So much to do!
“I have so much to do!” I have uttered these words – along with “I don’t know how I’m going to get it all done!” – quite a few times over the last two weeks. This last month has been especially rough it seems.
You know how sometimes you can go a few days or a week or, for some of you, maybe even a month(!) without having a gazillion things to do or places to be? And other times it seems like you only have time to do each day whatever urgent thing is required for the next day just to stay afloat. Working ahead is not even possible. You do know what I’m talking about, don’t you? I hope I’m not the only one!
It’s when I’m at my busiest that I often feel most susceptible to that lovely feeling we all experience at one time or another called – you guessed it – Mom Guilt. The kids are fed (maybe not the most nutritiously, but they have had sustenance). There is a load of clean dishes in the dishwasher (we won’t mention the pile of dirty ones in the sink). And there most likely is a load of clean clothes in the dryer (though I may have lost count as to actually how many days they’ve been sitting and wrinkling in there). I haven’t had time to sit down, much less invest quality time in my family.
And on top of everything, I feel guilty. Guilty for giving my kids chicken nuggets for lunch three days in a row. Guilty for turning on a movie for my toddler (again) so that I can have a few minutes to work by myself. Guilty for repeatedly telling my preschooler, “I’m sorry but Mommy can’t play with you right now.” Guilty for turning down requests to read aloud over and over. On and on the list can go. We parents are good at making ourselves feel guilty.
Mom Guilt
I’m not here to say that you should feel guilty. I’m not here to look at you and tell you that you are not doing enough. You will never hear me say you are failing in your role as parent. Those things just aren’t true. Everyone has different strengths and different passions. God chose you (weaknesses, strengths, interests, disinterests, and all) to parent these particular children. No one can love them and parent them like you can.
That said, sometimes we all could use a little help in the creativity department. We all could use some encouragement every now and then in the areas in which we’d like to see growth or change. We all could use some fresh inspiration to find meaningful moments even on our busiest days. This post (and really this whole website) is here to do just that.
So, what kinds of things can we do to engage and invest in our children even when we’re in the middle of all the numerous yet important tasks of each day? In what ways can we incorporate age appropriate chores for kids that help accomplish our daily tasks rather than simply create more work for the parents? Well, thanks for asking.
Some ideas for chores for kids
- I often have to make food dishes to take to various events. My kids love to help in the kitchen. I can let them pour ingredients, set the timer for me, watch things in the oven. They can stir pots and taste test (a definite win as far as they’re concerned).
- If I have to figure out an outfit, they love to be asked and allowed to put in their opinion.
One morning a few months ago, I put on an outfit and said, “I just don’t think I like how this looks” (gotta love that point in early pregnancy where neither regular nor maternity clothes fit right). My 8 year old said, “Me neither,” and promptly disappeared into my closet to pick out something else for me, my 6 year old close on her heels.
While I didn’t end up wearing “exactly” what they picked out, they sure had a good time looking through my clothes and deciding on what they thought looked good together. And it made them feel special that I listened to their ideas and let them help me choose clothes for the day.
- If I have to make a phone call, work on the computer, or do anything that they just can’t help with, I *try* to get them involved in something first. They can do a bit of schoolwork on their own, play outside, play a short/timed game on the tablet, watch one episode of a cartoon of their choice.
- If I have a lot of things to remember and gather before rushing out the door early in the morning, I put the kids in charge of different things to free me up for things only I can do. One child might pour cereal for everyone. One child might make sure the pets are fed. One child might gather all the library books to take back or fix snacks for the car.
- I have found that there is less dawdling and much less fighting with one another when they have certain jobs for which they are responsible.
We have a lot of road construction going on around our area, making us have to use alternate routes to go a lot of places. My oldest has made a sign to keep in the car. And they all (even the two year old!) take great pleasure in reminding me certain roads are closed and to go a different way.
- My kids also love to help with meal planning. Having an input in the foods we’re going to eat, and even getting to help in meal preparation, makes them feel special and teaches them life skills. Food has to be eaten every day; so we can take the time we spend planning and cooking to invest in and spend time with our kids. (I have kid-tested and approved recipes here on the site as well. These are a few of my family’s favorite meals. Give them a look!)
Is it worth the time?
If we put our minds to it, we can usually find some way to either let our kids help with our tasks or help them feel valued by us even while we are completing our tasks.
Involving our kids sometimes makes things take longer and is oftentimes messy but the time spent and the investment made is worth it. They’re young. They need us. But more than that, they want us. Let’s be sure to chase down every moment we possibly can into our children to make sure they know they are loved and know how to love others.
I made my own customizable chore chart that I use with my kids. It is great for assigning daily, weekly, and monthly chores. It is perfect for displaying the kids’ responsibilities in a way they can see and understand. You can download and print it here! Along with many other resources I have put together and made available for you in the Chasing Those Moments Shop.
And you can find lots of age appropriate activities listed out by age and category on the Activities page.
Training our kids is one of the most daunting, most important, and most rewarding responsibilities we have as parents. They can’t learn without us. Have any of these ideas sparked some creative inspiration with you? Do you have any ways that you’ve found to involve your kids in your daily tasks? I’d love to hear any of your ideas for age appropriate chores for kids!
Be sure to check out the next post how to deal with bad attitudes in both in our kids and in ourselves.
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